The Secret to Success

I refuse to quit message, handwriting with chalk on blackboard, lifestyle change conceptDo you love secrets?  I used to as a kid; it was so awesome to hear “I’m just telling you this and no one else.” How thrilling it was to be the keeper of the secret!  However, I soon realized there were others who knew the same secret… so it wasn’t much of a secret, was it?

Then, how can I tell you the secret of success and still have it be a secret?  Doesn’t really make any sense, right?  Well, okay, the secret really isn’t a secret.  BUT it is something that if you do it, you will have success!  And if you don’t, you will continue to have stress, frustration and overwhelm, not to mention much unhappiness and feeling bad about yourself.  So what is this secret to success?

Drum roll, please.  The secret to success is to change your perspective.  Yes, change your perspective.  Easy, right?  Well, not so fast.  If it were, we’d actually do it.  If change were easy – well, we’d all have so much joy, happiness and success all of the time.  So what makes changing our perspective so challenging?  That’s easy to answer: it is all in the word ‘change’.  We need to alter, amend or adjust what we are thinking, doing and saying.  And oftentimes we aren’t clear on that and so we say “I hate change.”  And because we ‘hate’ change, we won’t do it. 

Notice that last phrase “won’t do it” – it has such a limiting feel, doesn’t it?  Picture a child stamping his/her foot – they normally don’t say “I won’t”, they just say “NO!” It’s the same thing when you say ‘won’t’.  Hmmm.  Ringing any bells?  ‘Can’t’ is a word that shows up, too.  Do you ever hear yourself saying “I can’t” either out loud or inside your head?  So my friend, when you find yourself in that ‘won’t’ and ‘can’t’ place, that’s a good time for the perspective change to come in.

Think of a time where you were trying to get something done and you kept coming up against obstacle after obstacle and finally you said “Never mind, I give up.”  What happened?  Did you suddenly have a bright idea of how to get what you wanted?  More often than not, the answer is yes.  I know because it happens to me and to my clients, so I’m not just making things up here.  It’s because you decided (without you even knowing) to have a perspective change – you gave up.  But what you really did was release the expectation to the outcome you had going on in your head.

See, when we change the way we look at things, no matter how small, the things we look at change.  Dr. Wayne Dyer says that all the time and he’s right.

So the secret is easy, right?  Change your perspective and change your life.  Yet so many people resist it because they are used to behaving in a certain way, even if it isn’t consciously.  We self-sabotage all the time and think we have no control over anything that happens to us.  But we do, we do!  Change is NOT hard.  Change is easy.  It is what we tell yourself about change that makes it hard.  We make up all of these stories in our head about this and that, and rarely do they come true.  All that does is hold us firmly rooted in stress, frustration and overwhelm that leads to unhappiness.  Give this secret a try and shift your perspective to something that is more pleasing to you and will bring you the happiness you want.

What’s one thing right now that you can change your perspective on?  Maybe it’s something you have been saying “I can’t” about or stomping your foot saying “NO, I won’t”.  Where can you have a slight perspective shift that will take you from stress, frustration and overwhelm to joy, peace and ease?  Go on, I know once you do it you will feel so much better!

When you do, feel free to comment below and let me know what the shift did for you and how much better you feel!