It’s what you do that counts

Thought for the day.thought-for-the-day

If you can remember that it’s what you do that counts, then what happens to you won’t matter.

Today, no matter what happens, step back and remember that what you do counts. Are you reacting in a way that is negative or positive to yourself and others? Are you reacting in the same way for basically everything?

I like to teach my clients to respond rather than react, but first they need to know how they react in order to move to responding. When you can respond, you give yourself the option of being at choice. React, pretty much is just a default that happens automatically and often unconsciously.

Have you ever said, “Oh my gosh, I didn’t mean to do that?” or “I have no idea why I got so upset.” That’s your unconscious leading your actions rather than you being the leader. If you would like to react in a new, positive empowering way you can, all you need to do is start to notice how you react and then decide to change it. Then you can choose to respond.

 

 

Do you like your box?

Woman in red in box.jpgI just came back from a trip to Aruba.  I’ve been there before and love it so much, I’ll go again.  I’ve stayed at the same hotel the past five times but this trip I was at a different hotel.  That’s because my regular hotel — the one I liked and felt comfortable at — closed!  Oh the horrors!  So I put on my big girl pants and embarked on a trip that felt “normal” and comfortable but would be different.

It occurred to me that the same ole same ole, while it is comforting, can work to my disadvantage by keeping me in a comfort zone — aka a box!  I hate being in the box.  But I like my box!  Yet it also means that I’m not living my life and seeing and doing new things!  How did this happen?  Well, for one, I was happy at the hotel I stayed at.  I knew the people and what I’d get, and I liked that.  AND guess what?  That is a good thing.  Just like I create the “know, like and trust factor” for my clients.  Once they get to know me, they like me and then they trust me and stay with me, investing in themselves and getting great results and support.

So then how is this different?  It isn’t really.  My hotel created an experience that I really enjoyed and, truth be told, if it was still open I’d have stayed there this time!  I was happy there, I liked it there and I got what I wanted there.  Just like my clients stay with me.

What I noticed was that the idea of the change was something I didn’t like.  It was because I had to stay at a different hotel; it wasn’t my choice.  I hate that!  Don’t you?  Yup, there it is!  It’s the fact that I didn’t have control of the change.  I had to do it.

Thinking about this though, I see that there is value in having to make a change in your life.  It means that you must come out of your box and do something different.  I know from experience that there is such growth and happiness in coming out of the box and doing something new.

I have a few tips for you as you either choose change (i.e. get out of your box) for yourself or find yourself in a situation such as mine:

  1. There are no mistakes.  If you embrace it, you will soon see that no matter what it is that changes for you, there are opportunities for you to see something different, experience something new and become a more diverse individual.
  2. Every experience is an opportunity for a new beginning.  If you look at change as an opportunity then it no longer is a negative experience.  This viewpoint gives you the chance to behave differently and have an amazing outcome.  It becomes positive and increases the likelihood of having it turnout even better than you imagined.
  3. Embrace change.  Fighting it creates stress and frustration.  Embracing change gives you peace of mind.  And as mentioned above, the opportunity for having an outcome better than you imagined is possible when you embrace change.

In case you are wondering, I had a fabulous time.  I met amazing people whom we wouldn’t have met if we had been at the other hotel.  I got out of my comfort zone and had to navigate the new hotel.  My eyes were fresh, I was more alert and reminded that when I get out of my box, my world is so much more exciting and so much more fun!  Since I’m all about having fun, it’s a great reminder!

Let me ask you this: if you were to let go and trust that things will work out exactly as they are supposed to, wouldn’t you feel more relaxed?  Wouldn’t you be open and receptive to what comes to you?  I think you would.  I’d love to hear your experiences, please feel free to write me personally or post your comments below!