Being Open to Being Open-Minded

October 22, 2012 By

When it comes to making a shared decision, whether it be at home or in the office, do you sometimes think that only you can make the best decisions because you are the expert?  Are you the parent or manager who knows best?  What if I told you that you might not; would you think I was off my rocker?

This idea often shocks my clients.  For whatever reason, you believe you are the only one capable of deciding because you are the specialist.  Now to be clear here, when it relates to your personal feelings I’m not disputing or going to tell you otherwise.  Without a doubt you are the expert for any decision that involves you alone.  I teach my clients that absolutely no one should weigh in on why you should or should not feel a certain way.  In order to stand in your true power, you need to listen to your own feelings.  It is the only way to find your joy and happiness in life.

Yet, one place often misunderstood is when situations and outcomes involve other people.  Being the authority, you won’t ask for help, assistance, or outside information.  In fact, you can also be very close-minded if someone tries to share information that may be useful.  The belief is that you know best or already know everything you need to know in order to make the decision, so why bother listening to anyone else.  However, have you ever had the experience where someone shares something with you and you say “I wish I knew that before”?  That is where the value of listening to someone else comes into play even when you don’t think you have to.  It could make your life and job easier, you may avoid costly mistakes, and you’ll probably save time. There are many benefits.

An open-mind allows for possibilities and opportunities to come to us translating into more joy, happiness and satisfaction in our lives.  Many of my clients see that being open and receptive to hearing what someone else has to say makes their lives so much easier and more satisfying.  Here are three tips to get you started:

  1. Listen with an open-mind:  Are you shooting down an idea without really hearing what the person has to say?  If you are, chances are you are being perceived as pigheaded and inflexible.  Stop yourself and listen to the other person closely.  If necessary, ask questions to gain clarity. You might learn something!
  2. See it through a different pair of eyes:  If you are thinking “Oh, I already know that”, you’re falling back into old habits.  How can you see the situation in a new light that’s different from your point of view?  Look at it through the presenter’s eyes; what might they see that you are not.  It certainly could make a big difference in the final outcome.
  3. Try it on for size:  Even if you’re still hesitant, be willing to “try on” the new idea to see how it fits.  Run through a few scenarios in your head (or on paper if time permits).  How might this different idea change the outcome?  Remember, you always have to break in a pair of new shoes before they feel good!

In the end, you give yourself and others the opportunity to expand your vision.  When you have opened your mind to new possibilities and opportunities, you see things differently and can never make a wrong decision.  Just think of the success and happiness you will experience by being open to being open-mined.

Tell me about a time when you thought your decision was the only way to go yet you were proven otherwise? Or better yet, tell me about a time you were receptive to suggestions and wonderful things resulted!  I can’t wait to hear what you have to say below.

Filed Under: Personal Development Tagged With: , ,

What Is Important To You?

October 8, 2012 By

Have you ever made a decision, then once you learned more you realized it just wasn’t the right choice for you?  What did you do?  Did you change your mind?  Did you suck it up and forge ahead?  I recently had this experience and I did something completely opposite of what I would have done ten months ago (heck, three months ago) — I changed my mind.  I said “This is not for me” and it couldn’t have been more empowering!

What makes us say “yes” and then suffer when we realize our decision is not in our best interest, or for that fact, not in the best interest of the other people involved?  Why is it we feel that once we say “yes”, it is set in stone and has to be done or else?  Recently I wrote an article about letting go but this is more than letting go.  This is about being empowered to choose what is best for you even if it is not what someone else thinks is best for them.  It is about what is important to you, your goals, and your life.  It is about changing your mind for good reason and then standing in that choice.  It is about saying “no” even after saying “yes”.  Why is this important?

When we make a commitment and then want to change our mind but don’t, we do everyone involved a disservice.  We sometimes end up resenting the task, the person involved and even ourselves.  I know there were many times I found myself angry with the person who asked me and they didn’t even know it!  I held it in and pretended that everything was hunky-dory when it wasn’t.  Was it their fault, heck no!  They thought everything was okay because they asked me and I replied “yes”.

Saying “no” really is about staying true to yourself and respecting your life, your wants, and your choices.  Sure there are times when you want to help someone but you just can’t because of other things on your plate — those are easier to decline.

Tips for saying NO in the first place so you don’t find yourself in a predicament:

  • Don’t answer right away.  Give yourself time to think about it to see if it is something you want to do.  Often 24 hours is a good amount of time to wait to respond; you will know by then if you truly want to say “yes”.  If you are having a hard time deciding, it’s a good sign that your answer is “no”.
  • Gather as much information upfront as you can (if possible).  Make sure that you ask questions and get all of the information you need in order to make a good decision for yourself.
  • Remember what is important to you.  If what you are being asked to do moves you closer to your values and to what you want in your life, by all means, do it.  If it moves you further away from your goals, it’s important to decline.  This will keep you empowered and on track with how you want to live your life.

However, there are times when you really don’t want to help and commit anyway. Maybe it’s something that don’t you want to follow through with because the repercussions are too high. Or like in my case, I thought the commitment was for one thing and it turned out to be something much different.  Had I known, I would have said “no” from the get-go because I simply didn’t have the time.

Remember it’s okay to change your mind.  Here are a few tips to changing your mind as well as communicating your change of heart:

  • Let go of feeling guilty.  If you are a caring, compassionate person, it’s only natural that you may feel bad about this decision.  However, feeling guilty only serves to pressure you and keep you from saying “no”.  It holds you back.
  • Come from a place of honesty.  Be truthful about why you are changing your mind.  Say “I thought this was something I wanted to do, but I came to realize it isn’t.”  When you are direct, you feel better and so does the other person.
  • Respect yourself and them.  By respecting yourself, your choices and your decisions first, it is easy for you to respect the other person.  You can easily speak from the heart and there is much value in that.

So remember, whether you changed your mind or flat out said “no”, the decision is always your decision – for you to be happy, it can be no other way.

I would love for you to share any experiences that you have had with these situations.  I can’t wait to hear what you have to say!

Filed Under: Self Worth Tagged With: , , ,

You Hereby Have Permission to Stop

September 24, 2012 By

Is there something that you have been meaning to get to but just haven’t gotten to it yet?  Give yourself permission to let it go.  If you really were meant to do it, you would have and if it is still meant to happen, it will without you having to stress over it.

Many of my clients and colleagues — and me, too — put and keep way too much on our list of things to do.  Then for some reason we feel that we absolutely, without a doubt, have to do them all.  We feel if we don’t do what we either said we would do or planned to do that we’ll let someone down, let ourselves down or be viewed as a slacker.  But the truth is that often things on our list can and need to be deleted.

Of course, if there are things on there that you really need to do — like make the yearly vet appointment for the dogs or return a borrowed book to a friend — then by all means, keep them on the list.  However, if you continually are not getting to certain items, you need to implement a different strategy so that you do actually complete what really needs to be done.

It’s a great idea to know exactly what it is you want to get done and why.  The why is the reward and usually a good motivator even if the steps themselves are not. If you suddenly realize that something isn’t going to move you forward, maybe you don’t really need to do it after all.

On the other hand, oftentimes we can’t go forward because we don’t know what the next step entails.  If you don’t know what steps you need to take to get something done, figure that out first.  Productivity often follows clarity. A perfect example of this is the speech I recently gave to a women’s networking group. “Prepare for speech” didn’t give me a lot of clarity as to what steps I need to take in order to be prepared. Once I sat down and thought about it, I realized I needed to come up with a topic, create an outline, come up with content and samples, and have handouts (among other things). Knowing all these components made it much easier to move forward!

Below are some ideas to help you get on your way to “getting to done”:

  • Work with a coach for brainstorming and to keep you accountable for both personal and professional tasks.
  • Enlist the help of a friend or colleague you can talk to and check in with so that you stay on target.
  • Find a weekly accountability partner where you hold each other to what you said you would do.

And on the flip side, below are some ideas to get you on the way to letting things on your list go:

  • Delete it
  • Trash it

Yes, that is correct – you hereby have permission to stop.  Let’s face it, if you really wanted to do them, you would have.  Why stay in that defeated, bad-feeling space when you can put yourself in an uplifted, feel-good space?  Go on, try it and let me know what happens!

I can’t wait to hear what you have to say below!

Filed Under: Reaching Goals Tagged With: , , , ,

Are You Driven By Your Circumstances?

September 10, 2012 By

At 10:32 a.m. on Tuesday, September 4, 2012, I turned on my computer after a 17-day vacation…  and boy was it weird!  It was weird in that I was excited to be back in the swing of working.  It wasn’t always like this though, so it’s so awesome for me to have these feelings of excitement, anticipation and happiness to be back.  In my later years of working in corporate, the day before I’d go back to work from a vacation (heck, even a weekend) I’d feel physically ill.  I’d have trouble sleeping and then in the morning, I just couldn’t drag myself out of the bed.  I know it wasn’t because I was exhausted or even tired, I was just feeling run down from my environment which was unsupporting and toxic to me.  Have you ever felt that way?  If the answer is no, I’m thrilled for you!  But if you are like me and many of my clients who have been (or even still are) extremely beaten down by your work environment, please know that you can change it for yourself and you can do so in a way that is perfect for you!

I played the role of victim for a long time.  I allowed others to push me around and to do and say things that were hurtful, unsupporting, mean and aggressive.  I did not like conflict, so I would never speak up or ask for what I needed.  I wasn’t assertive and never honored my own feelings and what I wanted.  I just did what others wanted and became very unhappy and even began to be passive-aggressive.  It wasn’t until I hired my own life coach that I began to see how I was allowing others to treat me in this manner and that I had the power within me to be treated as I wanted to be treated.  I learned that what I wanted was just as important as what the next person wanted.  I decided it was time for me to be the driver of my life.

Here is what I learned and am going to share with you.  You too can be in the driver’s seat of your life and feel that you matter, not only to others but most importantly to yourself.

  • Lesson 1:  No one has the power to make you unhappy, feel bad about yourself or feel stupid.  When you trust, love and honor yourself, you understand that it is all about the other person’s insecurities.  It’s their inner critic that drives their behavior and has them acting in a non-supporting way toward others so that they feel good about themselves.  Don’t let them get to you.
  • Lesson 2:  Recognize that everyone (you and everyone else) has a basic need for being loved and accepted.  This is what each person is fighting for, often at the expense of other people’s feelings.  It’s not a personal attack.
  • Lesson 3:  It is A-OK to be selfish and put yourself first and ask for what you want. It’s also important to note here that it’s not what you say but often how you say it that really makes or breaks the situation.  Ask for what you want in a way that won’t ruffle any feathers.
  • Lesson 4:  Put yourself in the other person’s shoes and ask yourself why might they be acting or behaving this way.  Have you contributed in some negative way that has them doing what they are doing? Be honest in your assessment.
  • Lesson 5:  Always remember that you have the power within to change how you feel and respond to any situation.  Be conscious of your feelings and remember the outcome you want in order to feel empowered from within.  Think before you react.

Following these lessons — which I also share with my clients so that they feel respected first by themselves and then by others — will soon have you feeling more positive, happy and alive!  The joy is in creating a life that you want, the life that you will be happy living.  Perhaps you won’t need a new job after all.  Maybe you’ll decide, with your newfound ways of being in your life and acting in your life, that your skills and talents would be best appreciated elsewhere.  Either way, you have now put yourself in the driver’s seat and the decisions are yours and yours alone.  Happy driving!

I’d love to hear your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

Filed Under: Personal Development, Self Worth Tagged With: , , , ,

Not As Happy As You Want To Be

August 27, 2012 By

Do you love your life?  Are you not as happy as you would like to be?  Sometimes it’s what is happening on the inside that drives what is occurring on the outside.  How many times does it feel to you that your life is out of control?  Stuff is happening so fast and so often.  Your kids aren’t listening, the dog isn’t listening and your husband says you didn’t tell him what you know you told him.  Is it them?  Or is it you?

You aren’t going to like this…it is you.  If you are unhappy with what is going on, the first place to look is to you.  Great news though, you have the power to change it all.  Yes, you do!  What is going on inside is causing the turmoil on the outside.  What are your thoughts about yourself?  Are they positive, encouraging and supporting?  Or are they more along the lines of “I can’t believe I forgot that, you idiot!”  I won’t go on – I’m aiming for an upbeat feel here.

If your thoughts are negative and you are always putting yourself down, the chances are the negativity is all around your being.  Therefore, when people aren’t listening to you, you get annoyed, aggravated and even angry at them.  I call that the outward manifestation of your inner being.  What it really is though, is that you are truly annoyed, aggravated and angry at yourself.  So, then how can you turn that around and get the results you are wanting?

Here are five tips to turn it around:

  1. Remember that you have the power to change what you do not like by taking small simple steps.
  2. Stop being so hard on yourself.  When you hear your inner voice say something negative, stop it right there and remember a time where you felt confident.
  3. Be kind and encouraging to yourself.  Treat yourself as you would another person and you’ll soon shift to a better inner feeling.
  4. Start talking to yourself in a more positive and supporting way.
  5. Begin to pay attention to how you are being with others.  Are you showing up in a negative, unloving way and if so, shift that to a positive and loving manner.

Through your actions, what you will begin to see is a transformation in yourself.  You will see that you are communicating clearly and that others are really listening.  It’s almost like magic and truly beautiful.  You will notice yourself responding differently to others, and others responding to you in a good, positive, very pleasing way.

We see the outer part of ourselves so often we forget that we have an inner self as well.  Once we treat our inner self with respect, patience and love, we transform not only ourselves but those around us.  We see the world as a place of beauty; a vast area to live and breathe openly and with great joy.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, insights and revelations on below.

Filed Under: Personal Development, Self Worth Tagged With: , , ,

Who Said Changing Was Hard?

August 13, 2012 By

Truthfully, it doesn’t have to be hard.  Change can mean many things – alter, modify, transform, adjust, or amend.  Not such scary words right?  Yet why does the possibility of change scare so many people?  I’m finding that my clients are not afraid of change, but they are afraid of the possibility to change.  Ah, so it’s really resistance!  It’s the thinking that precedes the actual change that freaks them out and often leads to applying the brakes on their lives with such force that they leave skid marks as they come to a screeching halt in their progress.

Granted some changes that happen to us are extremely unexpected.  Some changes we expect yet when they happen we often find ourselves shocked.  Some changes we even set out to create for ourselves.  In all cases it really is about how we deal with the change(s) that occur or that we create.

Let’s talk about the ones we want to create for ourselves.  Often times what makes change hard is that resistance piece.  Yes, even if we really want to change, we are resistant to it.  Why?  Well, there are many reasons but one very big and important one is that as humans we very much like to have things stay the same because we feel safe, we feel comfortable and we know and like that.  It is the unknown that makes us think twice (or more) about making that change we said we wanted to create.

Recently a client kept telling me she really wanted to change her eating habits.  We created strategies and action steps for her and she’d do great for about a week or so.  Then she’d email me saying she “fell off the wagon and began eating poorly again, like I always do.”   I asked her two questions:  “How important is it to you to change your eating habits and why is it important?”  Her answers ended up being the key as to why she kept “falling off the wagon”.  Once she knew her answers, she was able to let go of the resistance and begin to get a solid grip on her wagon and not fall off.

If you find that you want to create lasting change but just haven’t gotten there yet, ask yourself those same questions.  After you have your answers, follow my suggestions below to move forward once you know why you feel resistance:

  1. Ask yourself “What can I do differently right now?”
  2. Create a plan of action – list several first steps you can easily take.
  3. Write down your action steps and put end dates on them to keep you moving forward.
  4. Trust yourself that you know exactly what to do.

Change really isn’t so hard.  I know, I’ve been there personally as well as helped others move through change so that they reach their goals.  If you find that you are just not there yet, my 30 Days to Success Program is a great starting point.  Email or call me to get started!

As always, I love to hear from you – what is one big take away and what one small step will you take on your road to change?  I can’t wait to hear what you have to say below!

Filed Under: Personal Development Tagged With: , , ,

What Are You Seeing?

July 23, 2012 By

Every night my husband uses this one baking dish – and every night I wash it.  We share the kitchen duties: he cooks, I do the dishes and we are both happy.  It’s ideal.  Well, it was until recently.  The thing getting under my skin was this one baking dish.  See, we don’t have a dishwasher – GASP, I KNOW!  I do the dishes by hand – GASP again!  And this one baking dish kept showing up and it began to irritate me.  Oftentimes it had to soak and it ended up being in the sink the next day because I would forget that it was there and I’d have to start my day by washing it.  Silly, right?

I needed to shift my perspective because this thing was really aggravating me!  I decided to look at this differently to see how it could serve me.  I began to think how this dish makes me happy.  My husband uses it to make us really delicious and nutritious meals.  Those are wonderful meals that we share together.  I came to recognize how the dish is a good thing and that my irritation to it was not.  My lesson here is about making a shift in thought from something that is annoying, irritating, aggravating or even a pain in the butt to something that is joyful, happy, supporting or even fun!

It happens.  You get annoyed, irritated, aggravated and even PO’d at something in your life.  It’s normal yet it doesn’t feel good.  I find that many of my clients are frustrated that they feel this way and look at it as a bad thing.   I tell them it doesn’t have to be!  It can be used as a tool to turn things around and feel more of what they want: joy, happiness and peace.

Are you intrigued?  I hope so.  See, once you see that you can change your perspective to work for you, it’s amazing what will appear in your life.  Let’s take exercise for an example.  You hate it, it’s grueling, it’s horrible, and it’s annoying.  Yet, I choose to exercise because it helps my body become and stay strong.  It helps me look and feel great.  It helps reduce my stress levels and makes me a happier, healthier person.   So, let’s turn it around.  By changing how you perceive exercise, you shift how you feel about it and can make it work for you! If you looked at exercise as something that fuels, supports and shows love to yourself, how would it make you feel?  You’d love your reflection (wink)!

Your turn, what turn-around would you like to experience?

Maybe it is a turn-around about how you view a certain task.  One of my clients is amazing at executing things; she is a ‘task-master’.  Yet she gets frustrated because she finds she is leaving things until the last moment.  This doesn’t exactly support her way of being – which is to be peaceful!  With my help, she decided to re-think how she went about planning, scheduling and executing her tasks.  And viola, she went from struggling to completion in no time!

Here are a few easy ways (you know I’m all about the ease) to transform how you think so that you may change how you feel about something that you are struggling with:

  • Start by determining what it is you really want to feel.
  • Ask yourself, “How will looking at this differently, and in a supporting way, help me accomplish what I want to accomplish?”
  • Make it fun!  Come up with a strategy that works for your personality and work style.
  • Celebrate your success!

So then, where can you make the shift that lets you feel more joy, happiness and peace?  I can’t wait to hear what you have to say below!

© Copyright 2012 Kim Ravida Coaching. All rights reserved. Feel free to use the material from the article in whole or in part, just makes sure you include this complete acknowledgement including the live website link and let me know where the material will appear: “Kim Ravida, owner and founder of Kim Ravida Coaching, is a Certified Professional Coach and a personal and professional motivation mentor. In essence, she motivates people to stop beating themselves up and helps them get off their butts so that they maximize their time and energy to quickly get what they want in their lives… and love their reflection! Kim produces a weekly ezine where she shares insights, inspirations, tips and ideas for setting and reaching personal and professional goals. To get more information or sign up, please go to www.kimravida.com.” 

Filed Under: Self Worth Tagged With: , , , , ,

You Thought It Was Just You!

July 9, 2012 By

Today I was talking with a client and she said something that was music to my ears.  I love it so much when clients finally have their “ah-ha!” moments! What she said to me was that because she made the decision to take care of herself, she was seeing all kinds of changes that were both positive and exciting!

Specifically, she said she had more energy, she felt better, she had more self esteem, and she had more patience for her work and tolerance of her customers — they didn’t annoy her as much (which is a good thing!).  She said she was ‘more laid back’, her kids were proud of her, they were all having more fun and doing more family things together like cooking and eating healthier dinners and they were even helping her clean up afterward.  They all wanted to spend more time together because they were all enjoying each other’s company.

(Did you happen to notice the underlying theme of “more” being better?)

This woman has six — yes, I said six — children: five boys and one girl.  She works full time, too, but she is at the gym every single day working out and seeing her efforts pay off.  She regularly asks me “Kim, how am I doing?” because she wants to improve every time she comes in.  I call this commitment!  And it isn’t just a commitment to herself, it is also to the life of her kids, family and all aspects of her life.

When we make a decision to put ourselves first and begin taking care of ourselves, all kinds of great things happen.  This lady started out only wanting to get her shape back – you can understand that, right?  Six kids!  And what she has found — and is still finding — is that there is WAY more to this ‘getting healthy, getting fit’ thing.  Yes, it is about having a fabulous figure that you love and feel good in, but it is also about self esteem, confidence, happiness, joy, and anticipation of what is to come into your life.

Where in your life have you not made a commitment? Something that you have been wanting to do, but just… eh, not gotten there yet?  Where are you ‘settling’?  Even though you know if you finally made the commitment to yourself that not only will your life be better but that of those around you will be better, too – heck, not just better but amazing!

When I teach my in-person group exercise muscle conditioning classes, I am famous for saying “Ok, today’s challenge is …” and then I give the participants the option to ‘take it or not’.  Would you like to guess how many opt not to take it?  If you said “no one”, you are correct!  Everyone has the opportunity to always rise to the occasion and some even go higher.  I tell them to remember that the challenge is all theirs and they can make it what they want, but that this is where they will begin to grow and stretch and get closer to their personal goals.  With my private coaching clients, I offer them similar challenges and no one ever says no – although it is an option.  They know that if they are open to it, they will see great growth, success and happiness.

My challenge to you is to pick one area in your life that you have been mulling about changing, shifting, or looking at differently and take one small inspired action step toward reaching it.  Maybe it is a health and fitness goal, a fun and enjoyment goal, a family goal, a personal goal, a financial goal – whatever it is the challenge is to pick, act and smile!  You too will be on your way to growth, success and happiness!

I’d love to hear your thoughts, insights and revelations – please comment below!

© Copyright 2012 Kim Ravida Coaching. All rights reserved. Feel free to use the material from the article in whole or in part, just makes sure you include this complete acknowledgement including the live website link and let me know where the material will appear: “Kim Ravida, owner and founder of Kim Ravida Coaching, is a Certified Professional Coach and a personal and professional motivation mentor. In essence, she motivates people to stop beating themselves up and helps them get off their butts so that they maximize their time and energy to quickly get what they want in their lives… and love their reflection! Kim produces a weekly ezine where she shares insights, inspirations, tips and ideas for setting and reaching personal and professional goals. To get more information or sign up, please go to www.kimravida.com.”

Filed Under: Self Worth, Wellness Tagged With: , , ,

Are You Taking Care Of You?

June 25, 2012 By

It’s kind of a buzz word — more of a buzz phrase — that we hear here, there, and everywhere!  But what does ‘taking care of yourself’ mean to you?  Are you thinking “I have no idea”?  Then you are not alone.  Let me help you because it took me a long time (and I mean a long time) to get it.  Here it is, the secret meaning behind that phrase – it means whatever you want it to mean.  Tah-Dah!

For example, I love to go for a manicure, yet I never seem to make myself an appointment.  There are various reasons; I don’t have the time, I don’t want to spend the money, I can’t find the number, etc.  Then one day I realized I was heading down a slippery slope because everything seemed so hard, my mind was racing, I wasn’t eating properly, nor was I exercising for myself.  It suddenly became clear to me that I was NOT taking care of myself.  So, I made a conscious effort to eat healthier, exercise more for myself, get enough rest and I made that appointment for a manicure.  Then some really cool things happened.  I relaxed, my mind stopped racing and I enjoyed myself.  Everything that I had going on around me didn’t feel so overwhelming or stressful or out of control anymore!

It was then I realized what taking care of myself meant.  It is all about what I enjoy and what brings me happiness — and no matter what it is, I have a right to it.  High on my list of what is important to me is my health and wellness; health in the physical sense and wellness in the overall sense.  Taking care of my mind, body, and spirit is truly what keeps everything in my life running smoothly – from running my business and helping out my family, to fun and recreation.

Where in your life are you NOT taking care of yourself?  I encourage you to take a moment right now to think about all the things you like to do but always put off for later when you think you’ll have time.  What brings you happiness, joy and good feelings?  What relaxes you or energizes you?

Here are a few of my favorite wellness tips:

  • Spend five minutes just breathing – sit quietly and focus on your breath as you breathe in and out.
  • Spend as little as 10 minutes doing some light stretching – yoga poses.
  • Take a brisk walk outdoors (with or without kids/pets).
  • Get out a novel and enjoy reading for pleasure – for five minutes or 30 minutes.
  • Schedule a facial, manicure, pedicure or massage.
  • Be present where you are and with whom (even if it is just yourself).
  • Play with your kids or your pets.

Don’t slide down the slippery slope of letting yourself go and wondering “When on earth did I start to look and feel old, tired and worn out?”  Instead, take the time to make a list of at least five things that you will do to help you begin (or continue) taking care of yourself over the next week.  Now schedule them, do them and — most importantly — enjoy them!  They’re good for you!

Please share with me below your tips and the things that you do to take care of yourself.  I can tell you, not only will you inspire me, but you will inspire all the fabulous men and ladies who are part of my world!

 

© Copyright 2012 Kim Ravida Coaching. All rights reserved. Feel free to use the material from the article in whole or in part, just makes sure you include this complete acknowledgement including the live website link and let me know where the material will appear: “Kim Ravida, owner and founder of Kim Ravida Coaching, is a Certified Professional Coach and a personal and professional motivation mentor. In essence, she motivates people to stop beating themselves up and helps them get off their butts so that they maximize their time and energy to quickly get what they want in their lives… and love their reflection! Kim produces a weekly ezine where she shares insights, inspirations, tips and ideas for setting and reaching personal and professional goals. To get more information or sign up, please go to www.kimravida.com.” 

Filed Under: Personal Development, Wellness Tagged With: , , , , ,

Are You Being Present? The Gift That Keeps On Giving

June 11, 2012 By

I do everything fast!  I talk fast, I walk fast, I eat fast, and I move fast.  I get a lot done, yet I also create a lot that needs to be re-done because I’m moving at the speed of light.  I make mistakes and messes and sometimes forget important things.

I thought I was on a call about a week ago only to learn afterwards that I wasn’t – now how did that happen?   I was so busy, moving fast and getting other things done that I didn’t even know I wasn’t present for it.   Ah! There it is – that word, present!  What does it mean?  Present:  ‘there, here, in attendance’ and the antonym is absent!  And guess what my moving at the speed of light did – it really made me absent from what I was doing.

Being present for yourself and others in the world is a gift – a gift of you!  So for the month of June, I have (much to the pleasure of those around me) made a conscious choice to be in the present when I am in the present.  This means listening to whoever is talking (no multitasking or thinking about a response or worse, what I need to do next), being mindful with the tasks that I am involved in (no watching the clock or wishing time away) and taking a few moments to breathe, relax and be aware of my surroundings.

I’ve been working at this for a couple of weeks and let me tell you – I see a whole new world!  Am I still getting things done, you bet!  And believe it or not — now, hold on to your hat – I’m getting more things done.  It seems when you take your time and are present in what you are doing, you don’t make a) mistakes and b) messes!  This is a whole new thing for me and it is fabulous.  The three values that are highest on my list right now are freedom, peace of mind and happiness.  This ‘being present’ is bringing me more freedom, peace of mind and way more happiness!

Not only that, but I’ve had some amazing conversations with my family, friends, clients and prospective clients just because I’ve slowed down to listen and be present with them.  I no longer feel anxiety throughout my body and my muscles are no longer tight and cramping.  I have more energy because I am breathing deeper and focusing on how I am feeling internally.  I can easily stop the madness even before it starts; which before was an amazing feat and now is becoming second nature.

With each article I write, I like to pose questions for you to begin taking small steps to change your life as well.  Remember, I am a DOer – I’ll do or have done whatever I ask you to do, too.  And I like to share what I’ve done to inspire and show you that I’ve gotten such great benefits and results, and so can you!

So question time:  Where in your life are you moving faster than fast, where you know if you slow down things will be fabulous?  How would your day look if you didn’t run on full throttle all the time?  How would it look if you took your foot off the gas completely? Where can you be more present for yourself, for others and for the world?

When I teach my group exercise classes, I sequence the workout so that my clients are in the present moment focusing on the movements and the muscles they are working.  Many remark at the end of the class “Wow, that went by so fast, I didn’t even realize that we were just about finished.”  That’s because they were present.  They were in a zone.  There really is – as I am finding out, and as you will too – no better place to be!

Please share your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

 

© Copyright 2012 Kim Ravida Coaching. All rights reserved. Feel free to use the material from the article in whole or in part, just makes sure you include this complete acknowledgement including the live website link and let me know where the material will appear: “Kim Ravida, owner and founder of Kim Ravida Coaching, is a Certified Professional Coach and a personal and professional motivation mentor. In essence, she motivates people to stop beating themselves up and helps them get off their butts so that they maximize their time and energy to quickly get what they want in their lives… and love their reflection! Kim produces a weekly ezine where she shares insights, inspirations, tips and ideas for setting and reaching personal and professional goals. To get more information or sign up, please go to www.kimravida.com.” 

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