So You Want to Lose Weight

April 22, 2013 By

day plannerCongratulations, you made a decision to lose weight!  Once you lose it, my guess is that you would like to maintain that healthy weight loss.  If so, that’s another fabulous decision on your part!  Okay then, what have you decided to do about setting the time aside to lose weight?  Oh right, you forgot about that part.

In my experience, the number one reason someone fails to begin a weight loss program is because they feel it is going to take a lot of their time.  It’s true; it can if you let it.  However, with some planning, weight loss doesn’t have to take up your day.  And once you get into a new routine, you create a habit and it becomes second nature.

I always tell my clients, “In the beginning, you will struggle.”  Whether they realize it or not, usually that is the reason they hire me.  They know I am there to hold their hand, help them figure out ways that work specifically for them and to pick them up when they fall down.

Here’s a tip: the joy in reaching any goal is in the journey.  That’s right, the good stuff as well as the not-so-good stuff.  See, it is in the not-so-good stuff where the greatest accomplishments lie.

Trying to change a habit, a behavior, a way of being is not easy but it is so worth it.  Until it becomes ‘just what you do’ and you no longer question it or struggle with it, you need to figure out a plan to make it work.

Here are three things for you to think about as you set off on your journey to losing weight and keeping it off.

  • Change how you think about time.  You might think time is limited – but is it really?  You do only have a certain number of hours in a day – everyone does – so how can you utilize time to work for you?  Try this.  List out what tasks you do in a day, then approximate how long it takes you to do each.  Before you actually begin a task, note the time and write it down.  When you end a task, note the time again and see how long it actually took you.  Seeing how long things truly take you will be big eye opener.  Most people are shocked at the time they lose during a day because they think something is going to take ‘just a moment’.
  • Are you satisfied with how you spend your time on a daily, weekly or monthly basis?  On a scale of 1-10, rate your level of satisfaction with how you spend your time.  Go back to your list and rate each of your daily tasks.  If something isn’t an eight or higher, challenge yourself to stop doing it.  In other words, if you are wasting your time on things that do not bring satisfaction, you will have no time for the things that will bring you satisfaction.
  • Map out your day in time blocks.  It’s easy to say “I don’t have the time”, but you do.  When you know how long your tasks actually take you, schedule them on your daily calendar.  It will help you visualize where your time goes.  You will see where you are losing time and also where you can fit in exercise, shopping for and preparing healthy foods, and taking time for yourself.  If you don’t have enough time for everything, then you need to re-evaluate your priorities.

Following my tips above will help you create the time you need for your weight loss success.  Truly, time is on your side.  Tell me your new plan or share your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

Filed Under: Reaching Goals, Weight loss Tagged With: , , ,

Three Steps to Success

March 11, 2013 By

goals listIt’s a small, four-letter word and it isn’t even a bad one, though most of us shy away from it!  When we do, sadly we also fail to reach our goals.  I know you are eager to know what that word is.  It is PLAN.  It also means: map, chart, diagram, sketch, and arrangement.  Simple enough, right?  Well then why do people not plan for their success?

This is a subject that constantly comes up.  We all have heard the quote “when you fail to plan you plan to fail.”  And it means that when you don’t set goals, wants, or intentions (or whatever you like to call them) you have no way of getting what you want!

With my coaching clients, we set specific plans together.  They know exactly what they are going to do, when and how.  When I work with my in-person fitness groups, they also set a plan for how they are going to reach their goals while they are in my program.

Let’s take weight loss… or even eating better.  You might not need to lose weight but I can almost bet at one point or another in your life you have said “I would like to eat better” or a variation of that.  (However, if you haven’t, please reach out to me.  I’d love to hear how you eat healthy on a regular basis; you are an inspiration!)  Most people say “I need to lose weight, I want to lose 10 lbs, I want to eat better, I need to eat better…” you get the idea.  And then that’s all they do.  That is as far as they get and then wonder why nothing happens.  Oh sure, they may go to the gym, walk, or cut back on certain foods, but there’s a missing piece.  There is no target, no date for when they will do this, and there is definitely no action plan.

Let’s see if I can’t help you move forward.  Here are three steps (I’m keeping it simple) for you to use to make your plan, follow through and experience the results of your plan.  By the way, this can be used for anything that you want to get or have in your life.  My big AHA was when I realized that I can use planning to get anything I want in my life – eating better, exercising more, and planning for a trip or an event.  Anything!

Step 1 – State what it is you want.  This is your goal, intention, target, purpose, and aim.  Get out some paper, a notebook, or your laptop and write this down.  This is your starting point.  Be as descriptive as possible.  “I will lose 10 lbs by eating healthy and exercising.”  State your end date, and make sure you give yourself ample time but not too much time.  You want it to be do-able but not so far into the future that you forget or don’t have anything to push you.

Step 2 – Create your roadmap.  This is where you write down all that you will do to reach your goals.  Using the goal above, here is an example:  “I will lose 10 lbs by eating healthy and exercising.  I will do this by going to the gym 2x a week and taking a cycling class and a muscle conditioning class.  I will plan out my meals and snacks for the week so that I know what I am eating and can shop for healthy ingredients.  I will drink 6-8 glasses of water a day.  I will keep track of my actions on my log sheet that I will create to hold myself accountable.  I will check in with my accountability partner weekly (or daily if I feel I need more support).  I am successful and I am already feeling great.  I am happy with my results.”  Make sure you end your plan with how you want to feel by using an “I am” statement.  It will help you stay on target to reach your goals!

Step 3 – Be accountable.  Another word for accountable is responsible.  Be in charge of your results and your destiny.  If you can’t trust yourself to do this, then you need to have a trusted friend or hire a coach.  This is the part where the rubber meets the road.  If you aren’t taking your steps, why?  When we tell others our goals, we almost always follow through.  It’s key to not try this on your own.  I recommend getting a notebook for you to track your actions and the results.  If you say you are going to drink 6 glasses of water a day (remember to be specific), how do you know that you did it?  Write it down; record it in a log sheet.  Keep yourself on target with useful tools like logs, plus they make it fun to report to your accountability partner.

That’s it!  The best part is that by keeping track of your goals, you see the results even if the scale didn’t budge.  You can see you are working at your goal and that by itself is such a great feeling!  It is all there and you can course-correct and make changes when you see something not working and do more of what is working.  That’s a beautiful thing!

I would love to hear how you do with following my three steps.  It doesn’t just have to be related to health, I’d love to hear how you have used them—or any tips—to be successful! Please share your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

Filed Under: Personal Development, Reaching Goals, Weight loss Tagged With: , , ,

Do you like to be challenged?

February 11, 2013 By

Female boxerWhen it comes to exercise, most of us do not like to be challenged.  We are happy that we just made it to the gym, never mind exert extra energy!  Heck, we might even hurt ourselves and we wouldn’t want to do that.

Exercise brings up a lot of negative feelings for some people.  I have worked with women who can barely get to the gym.  And one of my clients tells me that she hates to exercise, but then in the same breath says “But I love the feeling afterward.”  So every week she comes to class and when I ask her to amp it up, she does.

Some people have very positive feelings around exercise.  Another client has experimented with a number of different classes and programs because she enjoys moving her body and loves the idea of going and doing new things.  I’m proud of both of them!

There are many reasons why people exercise.  Some want to:

  • Lose weight
  • Increase energy
  • Look good
  • Fit into their clothes
  • Increase self-esteem and confidence
  • Reduce cholesterol
  • Reduce high blood pressure
  • Reduce stress
  • To interact socially

Not many realize that by exercising you can change your physical body and health as well as stretch and challenge your mind too.  You can change your outlook on life, your viewpoint on a certain situation, and even have a brainstorm about an issue you have been facing.

When we challenge our body, we also challenge our mind.  It’s being open and receptive to new things, fresh exercises, pushing ourselves to lift more and move faster, or do the same exercise perhaps in a new way that allows both our body and mind to grow and improve.

When you do the same routine day after day, month after month, you get the same results.  Many of my clients tell me “I need to do something different.  I need to change something.  I need to be pushed.”  This is because they want to grow, they want to experience something new, and they want to be challenged.  And yes, there are some that don’t want to grow or change but that’s another article for another day.  I’m guessing that you are in it for the change and that you want to be challenged – even if you are saying you don’t – because you want to improve, to feel great and to look fantastic.

Here are four tips to challenge you to exercise differently:

  1. Workout in a group.  If you are used to working out on your own, try a group class.  There is a lot to be said about working out with others; you naturally will push yourself just a little bit farther.
  2. Hire a Personal Trainer.  If you are someone who needs that extra push, find a trainer that you connect with.  Tell them your goals and have them support you with them; often being directed is easier than trying to figure out what to do alone.
  3. Take a new class.  If you always take the same class (spin, Zumba, kickboxing), try a class with a different instructor.  You will not only learn new moves, you will hear different cues that will keep your attention focused on what might come next.
  4. Go to a new environment.  If you have been going to the same gym for a long time, check out another gym even if you just go for a trial or single workout.  You will be exposed to a new atmosphere which will get your brain to function differently and you’ll look at things with a fresh perspective.  They also may have innovative equipment that you have never seen or used before.

What is important is that you challenge yourself to not only work your body in a different manner but to think differently to expand your world.  There is such value in that – you never know, you may meet your future spouse, business partner or new best friend.  When you challenge yourself to step it up, the world opens up to you!

I would love to hear any experiences you have had or will have as you step forward into a whole new world!  Also, feel free to share your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

 

Filed Under: Reaching Goals, Self Worth, Weight loss Tagged With: , , , ,

Are you here again?

January 8, 2013 By

Here we are, it’s January, a whole new year.  How exciting!  Or is it?  Are you one of the millions of people who make resolutions around your health?  And are you one of those millions who year after year make the same resolutions?  It’s exciting and satisfying when you reach your goals and downright depressing when you don’t.  There is a better way.  And it’s even easier than you might think.  Your year can be different: you can reach your weight loss goals!

I want to share with you a step-by-step plan to implement into your life.  The beauty of this strategy is that it works for everything–not just your health.

  • First, change your wording.  Use the word ‘goals’ instead of ‘resolutions’.  ‘Resolution’ to me immediately invokes thoughts of failure.  Goals = aim, end, purpose, and aspiration.  These words sound a whole lot better than resolution, don’t they?  So the word ‘goal’ should automatically put you in a better frame of mind and not make everything seem so daunting.  Also, stop saying “I have to” or “I should” and change it to something more uplifting like “I choose.”   I choose to lose 10 pounds this year.
  • Second, state your goal and then put an end time on it.  This makes your goal definitive and gives you ‘finish line’.  You will know exactly the timeline in which you have to accomplish it.  Get out your calendar and put your start and end dates in it as well as milestones along the way.   I will lose 10 pounds by March 31.
  • Third, determine what you will do to reach your end result.  When it comes to weight loss, there are many places to start and two really good ones are watching what you eat and exercising.  In order to lose 10 pounds, I will figure out how many calories I currently eat and then determine what healthy calories and foods I need to eat.  I will find an exercise that I enjoy and know I will do.
  • Fourth, make a plan.  Take what you learned and determined in step three and create a plan for the next several months. Remember that it will take time to reach your goal, whatever it is, so you need to road map to follow.  I will eat 3-5 servings of fruits and vegetables during the week and I will go to exercise class 1-2 times per week.
  • Fifth, find a support system.  Enlist a buddy, family member or coach that you trust and ask them to hold you accountable.  Share with them your goals and steps you are planning to take to move you to your end result.  You might think this is unnecessary but it’s actually quite important!  It’s too easy to fall back on old habits and procrastinate if you don’t have someone checking in with you to make sure you’ve done your homework. Jane, I choose to lose 10 pounds by March 31st and I need your help to make sure that I eat 3-5 servings of fruit and veggies each week and also exercise 1-2 times per week. Will you check in with me periodically to make sure I’m sticking to my plan?
  • Sixth, be flexible with your plan and with yourself.  As you work on your plan know that obstacles will show up.  There will be times when you will eat something that you think you shouldn’t or you won’t make it to your exercise class.  This does not mean you have fallen off the wagon; you merely hit a bump in the road.  It is how you deal with the bumps that count.  I wish I didn’t eat that piece of cake but I did. It doesn’t mean that I failed; it only means that I am human. Tomorrow I choose to do better.

These steps will help you get on track and stay on track for you to reach your weight loss goals.  Remember to set small, attainable goals and keep the timeframe in the short-term because when you have all the time in the world, it takes all the time in the world to complete a goal.  A shorter timeframe keeps you honest, on target and constantly seeing results.

Reaching your weight loss goals takes thought and planning.  It takes motivation, focus and determination.  It also takes a personal awareness and a knowing why you want that end result.  Do you want to lose weight to improve your health or maybe get off medications?  Do you want to fit into your clothes better?  Do you want to feel good about yourself?  All are valid.  What are your reasons?  What is holding you back?  How can you reach your weight loss goals this year?

Feel free to share your success, thoughts, insights and revelations below!

Filed Under: Reaching Goals, Weight loss Tagged With: , ,

Too much to do? How to not go crazy!

December 26, 2012 By

It never fails; you have a lot to do.  You have a lot you want to do.  You even go so far as to choose exactly what it is you are going to do by creating a to-do list.  Yet somehow you always feel stressed out, overwhelmed and pulled in several directions.  Why does that always happen?

There are many reasons, but more often than not it has to do with unrealistic expectations.  I see it time and again with my clients… and I’ve done it myself.  You put 20 things on your to-do list and then you get mad when you don’t get 20 completed.  Heck, you didn’t even get 10 done and feel lucky you managed to check off just a few!  Sure it’s about the planning—and I talk a lot about planning—but it’s more than that. It’s really about reasonable planning.  If you had a reasonable plan set with realistic expectations, you would have better results.

I work with a system called AIM Smart.  We aim for the middle—not perfection and not the least acceptable, but somewhere in between.  Think of it this way; by aiming for and hitting the middle, you’re hitting the bulls-eye!  I’m happy to say this system hasn’t failed me or my clients yet.  In fact, it is a really great and comfortable place to be.

“Wonderful,” you say, “but how do I know what the middle is?”  I’m glad you asked.  The middle is where you know you can, without a doubt, accomplish a task.  When you think realistically about a task or event, you determine what you can reasonably get done.  Unfortunately, what usually happens is you trick yourself into thinking you can do way more than that.  “Come on,” you say to yourself, “I can do better than that. There’s no reason I can’t accomplish more if I don’t have any interruptions or if I just buckle-down and do it.”  And so you push yourself and things don’t go the way you want them to or thought they would.  What results is often frustration, overwhelm, exhaustion, and disappointment.  Alternatively, aiming for the middle—the realistic—keeps us on an even keel to success and eliminates a lot of the stresses we put on ourselves.

Since I just celebrated Christmas, and for the first time ever had a really great time and did not over-exhaust myself, I’ll use it as an example to help you aim in middle so that you don’t go crazy with too much to do.

  • Know what your final outcome is.  Enjoy the month of December, preparing for Christmas with joy and ease and feeling good, energized and happy.  Spend time with family and friends.
  • Make a master list of all that you want you to do for your outcome.  1) Host Christmas Brunch, 2) Have gifts wrapped with fun holiday paper, 3) Get together with friends.
  • From the master list, plan what you will do to accomplish your goal(s) (do this for as many tasks as you have).  Host Christmas Brunch – know who to invite, select a time, plan menu, extend invitations, and shop for food.
  • Stop doing things more than once.  Plan the time and menu first, then invite the guests—not the other way around—so all questions can be answered the first time around no need for “I’ll get back to you.”  Plan the menu, double-check you what’s needed, and shop only once.
  • Keep yourself honest.  Ask yourself what is realistic that you can get done and then do that.  If you find you have additional time, consult your list and to do another task that you have time for – again asking what is realistic in the time you have available.
  • Keep your final outcome in mind.  By knowing what it is you want to have (i.e. calm, happy, enjoyable holiday season), it is easier to stay on target and reach your goals.

Old habits are hard to break, that I know!  I also know that new habits are easy to make, all you need is a plan to be in the middle!

Feel free to use these tips as you head into the exciting and fresh New Year.  You can do things differently and you can make lasting positive changes.  You can have what you want.  You only need to have realistic expectations.  What are your realistic expectations?  Please share!

Filed Under: Personal Development, Reaching Goals Tagged With: , , ,

Stop Sabotaging Your Success

December 10, 2012 By

You just returned from a conference or workshop or just completed some on-line training and you are excited!  You now have a ton of new ideas and can’t wait to get started on them… but wait, you have something to finish first.  Or maybe lots of somethings to finish first before you can implement all this great new stuff.  Well, no problem, you will just do it later.

The trouble is that later never comes and you end up with these great ideas just sitting on the shelf or in your head.  After a while you forget what that great idea was or you think to yourself “Yeah, well, it wasn’t that great an idea anyway” and talk yourself out of what could have been a really amazing idea that lead to a lot of success.  Or you might remember that you shelved your notes, manual or other information and all you need to do it get it out…but where oh where did you put it.  Oh well.

I see this all the time with weight loss and trying to eat healthier.  Clients say they have tried everything from Weight Watchers to personal training and other various self-help programs.  The information sounds great and gets you excited but when left to your own devices it just never seems to get implemented.  You start to feel like you never see results, so why bother in the first place.

What I have discovered is that those who tell me they have tried everything are really sabotaging themselves.  There is often no follow-through with the information or direction they received.  In reality they just don’t put forth enough effort yet they believe they tried everything and again nothing has worked.

Truth be told, it can be daunting and confusing to know what to do with all the information acquired.  The best option is to put your ideas into a plan so that they become actionable and lead you to your success.  My tips below will help you do this.

  1. Know what your end result(s) is/are.  Begin by looking at what you want to accomplish.  Example:  I want to lose 10 pounds in three months.  Once you have a starting point, you can decide how you will go about losing those 10 pounds. Now you are ready for the next step, putting those ideas into a plan.
  2. Write it down.  The saying “if you fail to plan, you plan to fail” is very true here.  By writing down what you are going to do, you can hold yourself accountable.  You know exactly what your steps are so you don’t have to guess–or worse, forget!  You have a blueprint; a plan to follow and all you need to do is follow it.  A great tool here is a timeline and/or a tracker sheet.  Decide which step you will take first and so on.  This way you will always know where you stand at a quick glance and can course-correct.
  3. Get an accountability partner or coach.  Find someone you trust or hire a coach to hold you accountable to what you say you want to do.  Make sure this person will be completely objective.  A coach who specializes in what your goals are will be able to not only hold you accountable but also hold your hand and answer any questions that come up.

These tips are universal!  They help with everything whether you want to lose weight, eat healthy, increase your income, build a business or have better relationships.  Knowing what your end results will be, having a plan, and being held accountable are all key to reach success.

When I work with my private clients, we follow this same process and they get better results more easily without a lot of stress and aggravation.  They know they are setting themselves up for success and that the failure and frustration they knew in the past is long gone.  They report having peace of mind, joy and lots of fun living their lives…on top of great success for themselves and their goals.

What about you?  How will you feel once you pull a project off the shelf and take action on it now? Feel free to share your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

Filed Under: Reaching Goals Tagged With: , , ,

Are You Zoning Out?

November 26, 2012 By

If you haven’t reached your goals yet—for this year or for your life—it could be because you are zoning out, living in your comfort zone. 

I’m the first to admit that I thought my comfort zone was very good to me for much of my life.  But truth be told, I didn’t have much of a life!  Ironic, eh?  It was when I decided to step—no, jump out of my comfort zone that the most extraordinary things began to happen.  I met the man of my dreams, got married, left an unsatisfying job and started my own business.  I have been living happily and fulfilled in my life for a little over two years now and I wouldn’t go back!  Oh sure my comfort zone shows up every now and again, more than I would like, but it’s all good because it shows me that it’s time to stretch myself to the next level.

Does the following description sound like you?  You live your life in fear: fear of looking like a fool, fear of appearing stupid, fear of what other people might say, or fear of not knowing what or how to do something.  That’s how my life looked.  I never set foot outside my comfort zone and therefore missed so many wonderful experiences and opportunities.

It is now my quest to help others break free of their comfort zone so that they can have their best life ever.  My clients take great strides forward.  Sure, sure, initially they are hesitant but they called me in to help them…and help them I do, and for the most part painlessly too.  Look, change isn’t easy but it is very much worth it.  You can either stay in your comfort zone or stretch out of it for the most unbelievably satisfying life!

Here is a step-by-step exercise to move you out of your comfort zone. Grab a piece of paper and write down the answers to these questions (I even provided some examples to help get you started).  Oh, not to worry, these can be baby steps.  If you want to run, you first need to feel good about walking.  These will do that!

  1. What is one thing that you really want to try but are afraid? I want to try a new exercise class.
  2. What makes you scared and/or nervous about it?  I’m scared that I won’t know what to do and will feel stupid.
  3. Why do you feel this way?  I feel nervous because I’ve tried other exercise classes before and I didn’t know what to do and felt awkward.  I don’t like to be the new person.  I don’t want to be the one who doesn’t know everything.
  4. Why do you want to do this one thing; what are the results you are looking for?  I know I need to find an exercise I enjoy doing, and will look forward to, so that I can manage my weight.
  5. How will you feel once you do this one thing?  Elated, excited, proud and energized.
  6. What are things you can do (no matter how small) to help you step outside your comfort zone so that you can experience those feelings?  Find exercise classes in my area that I am interested in.  Go and meet the instructors.  Ask if I can observe a class or try it as a guest. 
  7. What timeline are you willing to assign to each of those steps in order to reach your goal?  I will research exercise classes tomorrow, meet two instructors over the weekend, and observe or try out one class by this time next week.
  8. How do you feel now, knowing you have a plan?  I feel relieved and encouraged because now it doesn’t seem so scary.
  9. Who will you share this information with that will hold you accountable to your schedule?  One of my best friends who loves to exercise but lives too far away for us to be exercise-buddies would be excited for me to do this. Or my husband because he can help me with chores and errands to allow me the time to make this happen.
  10. What’s stopping you now?  Nothing!

Being afraid to try something new certainly shows up in many areas of our lives, not just exercise. I used this example of an exercise class because I am a fitness instructor and coach, and I come across this scenario all the time.  Let me say that good instructors welcome “newbies” to the class.  And if they know you’re new, they’ll usually give extra instruction so that you can follow along. There’s no reason to be intimidated!

Staying in our comfort zone does not do us any good mentally or physically.  We need to stretch our mind and body in order to stay alert, active and healthy.  As you may have figured out, a lot of what keeps us in our comfort zone is in our heads.

This week, take one action step toward reaching one of your goals that you have been afraid to try or to go after.  When you do, write and let me know how it turned out for you.  I’d love to hear about how you felt before you took the step that started you moving out of your comfort zone…and then how you felt after!  Also, feel free to share your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

Filed Under: Reaching Goals, Wellness Tagged With: , , , , ,

You Hereby Have Permission to Stop

September 24, 2012 By

Is there something that you have been meaning to get to but just haven’t gotten to it yet?  Give yourself permission to let it go.  If you really were meant to do it, you would have and if it is still meant to happen, it will without you having to stress over it.

Many of my clients and colleagues — and me, too — put and keep way too much on our list of things to do.  Then for some reason we feel that we absolutely, without a doubt, have to do them all.  We feel if we don’t do what we either said we would do or planned to do that we’ll let someone down, let ourselves down or be viewed as a slacker.  But the truth is that often things on our list can and need to be deleted.

Of course, if there are things on there that you really need to do — like make the yearly vet appointment for the dogs or return a borrowed book to a friend — then by all means, keep them on the list.  However, if you continually are not getting to certain items, you need to implement a different strategy so that you do actually complete what really needs to be done.

It’s a great idea to know exactly what it is you want to get done and why.  The why is the reward and usually a good motivator even if the steps themselves are not. If you suddenly realize that something isn’t going to move you forward, maybe you don’t really need to do it after all.

On the other hand, oftentimes we can’t go forward because we don’t know what the next step entails.  If you don’t know what steps you need to take to get something done, figure that out first.  Productivity often follows clarity. A perfect example of this is the speech I recently gave to a women’s networking group. “Prepare for speech” didn’t give me a lot of clarity as to what steps I need to take in order to be prepared. Once I sat down and thought about it, I realized I needed to come up with a topic, create an outline, come up with content and samples, and have handouts (among other things). Knowing all these components made it much easier to move forward!

Below are some ideas to help you get on your way to “getting to done”:

  • Work with a coach for brainstorming and to keep you accountable for both personal and professional tasks.
  • Enlist the help of a friend or colleague you can talk to and check in with so that you stay on target.
  • Find a weekly accountability partner where you hold each other to what you said you would do.

And on the flip side, below are some ideas to get you on the way to letting things on your list go:

  • Delete it
  • Trash it

Yes, that is correct – you hereby have permission to stop.  Let’s face it, if you really wanted to do them, you would have.  Why stay in that defeated, bad-feeling space when you can put yourself in an uplifted, feel-good space?  Go on, try it and let me know what happens!

I can’t wait to hear what you have to say below!

Filed Under: Reaching Goals Tagged With: , , , ,

Are You Wondering How You Can Easily Move Forward

May 7, 2012 By

Do you know the place in your head where you put things for ‘later’… and then later never comes?  I do!  And boy was it causing me angst.  See, I just learned that by doing that I was putting off making decisions — and we all know where that gets us don’t we?  It gets us no where!

For example in the case of someone being overweight, by a lot or a little, there’s a black hole – they just put stuff there to deal with later.  In my experience, the stuff is often things they have happening in their lives that they would rather not have happening.  So they put their feelings away for later by eating to conceal their emotions.

Does that sound like you? Did I scare you?  I hope so, because what I want is to bring awareness for you just like I had awareness recently about my own black hole.  Let me tell you the good news: it almost always comes down to fear.  We are afraid of something, whether it’s ourselves, others, or the unknown.  So what do we do?  We put things away to deal with at another time when we think we won’t be afraid.  Well, guess what?  Later has arrived!  It is time to deal, decide and move on!  The big buzz word now-a-days is ‘moving forward’ – yet, in my practice I see lots of people doing just the opposite, they are standing still.  I’m discovering this is because they haven’t dealt with their black hole.

Let’s deal with it! Here are seven steps that will help you deal with it, begin to make decisions and then follow through so you can move on.  Because I know — really, I do — that you do not want to be or stay where you are.  I’ve had clients and people close to me in the exact same situation and they always say, “I want to move forward but I don’t know how”, so let me get you started moving forward.

  1. Acknowledge that you have a black hole and what it is.
  2. Recognize that your black hole served a purpose for you. At the time that was a good thing, but not anymore.
  3. Think about where you really want to be or how you really want to feel.
  4. Decide on ONE thing you can do to take a small step forward toward that goal.  Say it out loud and then write it down.  Put a date when you will do it and post it where you will see it.
  5. Take the action — DO — what you said you would do in Step 4.
  6. Celebrate your small step and be proud of what you have accomplished! Reward yourself responsibly.
  7. Repeat Steps 3 through 6 over and over again until you have eradicated your black hole and reached your goal.

Seriously, how hard was that?  It is not impossible, right?  I just followed those steps myself.  See, I like to play along with you because not only am I inspired by knowing that you will be taking these steps, I am a true believer in walking your talk.  It’s not “Do as I say”; it really is me doing it as well!  If I inspire you to take action, then I’m a very happy person!

I’d love to hear about your black hole; please share your thoughts, insights and revelations below.

 

© Copyright 2012 Kim Ravida Coaching. All rights reserved. Feel free to use the material from the article in whole or in part, just makes sure you include this complete acknowledgement including the live website link and let me know where the material will appear: “Kim Ravida, owner and founder of Kim Ravida Coaching, is a Certified Professional Coach and a personal and professional motivation mentor. In essence, she motivates people to stop beating themselves up and helps them get off their butts so that they maximize their time and energy to quickly get what they want in their lives… and love their reflection! Kim produces a weekly ezine where she shares insights, inspirations, tips and ideas for setting and reaching personal and professional goals. To get more information or sign up, please go to www.kimravida.com.”

Filed Under: Reaching Goals Tagged With: , , , ,

Are You Sleeping Through Your Life?

April 23, 2012 By

Do you ever feel like not getting out of bed in the morning?  Are you exhausted because you have so much to do?  What about what others want from you?  Do you look around and say “This is my life?  Really?”  And then want to pull the covers over your head?

Let’s say you have decided to go to the gym every morning and are finding that gee, you just can’t seem to get out of the bed.  You just lie there hitting the snooze button again and again and again.  You’ll go tomorrow.  And then, well, we know how that goes.   If you are still reading this, you may even be one of those people who “I’ll do it tomorrow” is a regular thought or phrase for you.

You know, sometimes it’s great to ‘do it tomorrow’ – remember we can’t always do everything in one day.  I know that first hand as I’ve chosen to only spend five hours in my office.  So then, how do we ‘do it today’ and not put it off and essentially sleep through our lives?

First, acknowledge that we cannot do everything.   As women we like to do it all, yet, exactly what is the ‘all’?  And who is the ‘all’ for?  Second — after you have answered the above two questions — determine exactly what it is you want and why.  Do you really want to go to the gym?  If the answer is yes, then by all means, figure out a plan to get there.  If the answer is no, whew, we now have an answer as to why you haven’t been able to get there.

Ok, so you are asking “Now what?”  If you really want to do something, you have to make changes in your life.  If you want to get in shape, feel better, fit into your clothes and have greater health, it’s time to figure out a way for you to do that for yourself.

I’ve used the example of exercise but this can be related to all things.  You can be sleeping through your life by not spending quality time with your children or staying in a job you hate and that is unsatisfying.  There are many ways we sleep through our lives.  Once you make the decision to – as Steve Jobs says –‘change something’, you will find that you are less exhausted in your life, not sleeping through it as much and beginning to enjoy it and come alive like you never thought possible.

As a coach, I help women fit the pieces of their lives together, so please, if you even question “Could I be sleeping through my life?” – let’s talk.  It costs nothing to talk and we’ll see if coaching may be for you.  Remember, coaching is about moving forward.  There is the beginning, the glorious middle and then an ending for which you are not only moving forward but finding that the pieces of your life are fitting you better than imagined!  There is magic in that!  Email me to schedule a call.  Don’t wait to wake up!  Do it now!

I’d love to hear your thoughts, insights and revelations below!

 

© Copyright 2012 Kim Ravida Coaching. All rights reserved. Feel free to use the material from the article in whole or in part, just makes sure you include this complete acknowledgement including the live website link and let me know where the material will appear: “Kim Ravida, owner and founder of Kim Ravida Coaching, is a Certified Professional Coach and a personal and professional motivation mentor. In essence, she motivates people to stop beating themselves up and helps them get off their butts so that they maximize their time and energy to quickly get what they want in their lives… and love their reflection! Kim produces a weekly ezine where she shares insights, inspirations, tips and ideas for setting and reaching personal and professional goals. To get more information or sign up, please go to www.kimravida.com.” 

Filed Under: Reaching Goals Tagged With: , , , , ,
« Previous Page
Next Page »